Basic background: I am 8 months pregnant with a mans child that I thought I would be with forever. When he met me my mother had an extensive talk with him about the fact that I had MS and that it can be a very unreliable disease but would most likely at some point be disabiling. I am almost 30 and he is 40. My mother also told him I had never been able to conceive and had actually tried fertility drugs with my ex husband. He continued to persue a relationship with me knowing this. I was friends with this man for over 2 years prior to us dating and was there for him thru the ending of a 20 yr marriage, his home burning down, him losing his business, his teenage daughter getting pregnant, etc. 3 months after we moved in together I found out i was pregnant. I didnt believe it at first and was kind of freaked out bc I had given up hope. He was excited and made several comments about how he prayed for it to happen and that he never wanted to use protection bc he wanted to give me a child. After finding out I was pregnant I had to stop all my MS injections and depression/anxiety pills, etc that help my MS. I started getting scared and we started having problems, he didnt seem to want to listen to me, was very jelous, somewhat controlling, etc. I threatened to leave him several times, yet never did mainly because we are having a child together and my thoughts were that if it could work I needed to stay. So over the past 8 months I will admit that I have been very emotional, very needy, and bossy at times. I started having problems comprehending info and dealing with problems, so i went to see my doctor, because these issues were effecting mine and his relationship and the doctor informed me that the bundle of nerves connecting the left and right side of my brain have been severaly damaged bc of a relapse, probably right before i got pregnant. Most of my MS problems are congnitive, visual, speech, a few physical.
A few weeks ago we all had to move into my parents house bc he is rebuilding his home after a fire, and our lease elsewhere ran out and he only had a few weeks to go. My boyfriend and I got into an arguement a few days later bc his 20 yr old son jumped into one of our conversations and was very rude to me and I said something to him. When I asked my BF why he was mad at me and not his son, his response was “bc he didnt mean it like that” I asked why he always assumed I meant things rude and his response was “bc your just that type of person, rude, hateful, mean and demeaning”. There was some yelling and I asked him to leave bc I just couldn’t deal with it. So he left and we saw each other here and there and I was really hurt bc I do love him so much. We spent Christmas together then him, his kids and his mom whom were all at my parents house for the holidays decided to go to his mothers and did not invite me and made it clear I wasnt invited. That started an argument bc I was crying saying I felt excluded and he didnt understand that.
I have started having complications with my pregnancy and cannot shave my legs, take a shower by myself, etc. I am really scared and asked him to move back in, bc the baby is so close to being here and I feel like we needed to work things out if we could. He tells me he loves me but cant commit to me, then goes on about how he has no intentions of marrying me, and just made me feel like complete crap, hes blaming this on me for me asking him to leave and for me yo-yoing him as he puts in over the course of my pregnancy. I begged him to come talk to me so we could figure something out and talk, he said he didnt ahve time, then he told me that I couldn’t “rush” him into loving me and that I couldn’t “make” him commit, which i understand but that hit me the wrong way with me being 8 months prego and all, so I was like “fine you want out then come get your crap” so he shows up 10 mins later with all the time in the world. Gets his stuff, and as he was leaving I gave him back the cell phone I had of his and he grabbed my hand said he loved me, and I told him I did him to but I couldn’y “just date” a man I was having a child with, and then here comes his 20 yr old walking up all bowed out like im gonna kick his dads butt. So we didnt get to talk, my BF just told me he was doen and was throwing his hands up and that I pushed him to that point, etc. I personally cannot see that I have done anything bad enough to make him want to leave his son and me. We both had said stupid mean things, but nothing deathing cruel, we both have just done stupid things, but there has always been honesty, faithfulness, and I have always worshipped the ground he walked on. My only complaint was when he lists things important in his life, its God, my kids, my mom, my home, my dogs, you, our unborn son, and my friends and other family. When I list importance out its God, him, my son, my parents, other family members, my dog then my friends. His mom treats me bad bc he doesnt stand up for me and when he

Female in her late 20s. Has a bachelors degree from 4-5 yrs ago. Was working in business admin, got laid off last yr, in the meantime has worked business admin temp jobs and waitressing jobs along with returning to school to get certified to teach high school science and math. She is done classes in December, starts teaching in january, and will be fully certified in her state in may 2010. When she’s not waitressing or in class, she volunteers at a daycare…the daycare staff thinks she does it to prepare for teaching(even tho she’s getting certified for high school, not early childhood edu) but in reality she does it to prepare for motherhood. Her 2 parttime waitressing jobs dont have healthcare benefits, but she has Blue Cross health insurance she pays for herself.

Health: She is deathly concerned about her fertility. Recurrent miscarriages runs in her family, and she’s had a few of her own several yrs ago. Mother reached menopause early at age 40. She also has extremely high risk of cancer in her family(mother died from it), esp cervical and breast cancers. Before she emptied her savings paying for grad school, she spent a mint on diagnostic testing at a fertility clinic to make sure she’s ok to have kids after her 2 prior miscarriages. Otherwise she is healthy except for high cancer risks.

Finances: Right now she doesnt make much money BUT she has no debt except $7K in student loans from undergrad college yrs, currently deferred since she returned to school. She hasnt taken out a single loan for grad school yet since she a) hates debt and b) doesnt qualify for much due to last yr’s pre-layoff income + having no dependents or equity to her name. Bad part about that tho is shes blown thru her savings paying for grad school with cash. Last yr she paid off her car loan early. She manages her money very frugally. Her credit score is in the mid-high 700s, is never late on a bill. To save money while in school and to hopefully further her relationship, she lives at her bf’s house.

Lifestyle: She had her fair share of party days and “playing the field”, but she is settled down and conservative now…wants to settle down, get married, and get pregnant asap more than anything else in the world. She doesn’t smoke, do drugs, drink(except 1 single glass of wine on rare occasions w/ the bf), nor party. She’s very loyal to her bf. Her hobbies include: cooking, decorating the house for holidays, volunteering with kids, playing with her pets, and obsessing about anything pregnancy-related. She is unhappy with her lack of kids or career right now, feels she’s been waiting too long, and her biggest downfall is she’ll whine about this to her close friends too much.

Family: Her family relationships are rocky at times. Her mom is deceased, she talks to her dad on occasion, but she’s frequently outcasted like a black sheep by her siblings + her mom’s side of the family(which includes grandma, aunt, and cousins). Her dad’s side of the family likes her tho and she has a good relationship with her uncle. Her family + relatives live within an hour of her.

She’s not married but has a live-in boyfriend she’s been with for 2yrs. Bf is 40, traditional morals, has a stable career in the science field, makes decent income, owns a 3bd home in a nice neighborhood. Bf is an all around good guy and her family esp her dad adores him very much. Bf thinks that it’s the man’s job to support his wife and kids, and that a mother’s #1 job should be to care for the kids…this is in total agreement with her values and ideals. Only concern about the bf is that he is very slow with proposing and gets annoyed when she inquires about babies and marriage, claiming she’s “too persistent” even tho she(and her friends) don’t think she is that much. Bf has no kids, never been married before, but was engaged at age 25 but it ended very badly so perhaps he is jaded from that and that’s why he’s slow moving in relationships now(idk maybe?).

Is this girl ready for a baby?
Also, shes a law abiding citizen whos biggest flaw is having a bad attitude about not being pregnant, which she sometimes takes out on her friends. She thinks bums are extremely annoying but on the other hand she donates $$ and cars to charity organizations.

She is a generally nice person who used to be too nice to the point of being used and stepped on by others…but in recent yrs has worked very very hard to learn how to be more assertive and to tell people to “back off”. She is almost as obsessed with assertively standing up to people, as she is with wanting to be pregnant.

She reads tons on the following subjects: pregnancy, politics, news/media hype.
cathrl69, if the guy has traditional morals, then that means he DOES think it is ideal to be married first before having kids, so maybe that’s part of the reason why he doesn’t want to discuss the kid thing?? also, traditional morals includes his belief that although he wouldnt want to have kids before marriage, if it happened, he would marry the girl.

I met this guy on a dating site and within each profile there are options to choose from regarding whether or not you want children. It was very clear that mine said yes. His said undecided which is fine because that can always be discussed together. I’m turning 40 and he is 43. I took a fertility test and my doctor said that I will be fertile for quite a few more years with no complications, but I don’t want to be in my mid 40’s and first having children.

6 months into the relationship I wanted to make sure we were on the right page because I ‘m not into manipulation or playing games. He said he still wasn’t sure if he wanted children, so I figured I would give him some time to think about it. A months ago we broke up because he refused to apologize for referring to my mother in a disrespectful manner. He waited to months to finally come through. I told him that I needed to be able to trust him again and that I want to have a meaningful relationship that leads to marriage and kids. I was very clear that this is what I wanted. He asked me to go away on a mini vacation with him for Memorial Day weekend so I went.

I tried to reintroduce the topic about a month ago and he seemed to be wishy washy with his responses. After Memorial Day we got back and I brought this up again because I just had the feeling he wasn’t taking me seriously. I told him that I wanted to make sure that our relationship was headed in the right direction and that we are on the same page. He then tells me that he has no interest in children now. So I was honest with him and I let him know that we should either break up or I should start dating other men because I need to keep my options open. He told me that because he has helped me with money in the past that I did not appreciate his generosity which is so not true. I just have way too much self respect to allow a man to lead me on.

I said to him, “Suppose a year or 2 later you tell me you don’t want children. How do you think I’d feel?” He said he never thought of that and that he only thought of how great we are together. So I said that I couldn’t believe that he thought I would risk losing my dreams in life just to be with him. Why would I waste my last child bearing years with a man who doesn’t care about what I want and who knows that’s what I want and then gets angry with me that I would “dare” to want such a thing. Then he said that he wished that I could have came to him with this before we went away for Memorial Day weekend so he didn’t have to waste all that money. He also said that he really doesn’t need anyone as good as me. I felt totally devalued. I just can’t believe that I really spent a year of my life with someone who is so selfish and uncaring.
I would like to highlight some points out of one of the best answers here by G Love.
He asks:

“How does it make you feel when he talks about how he spends money on you? Do you want the love of your life to think about how much money he spends on you and then expects you to be grateful?”

My answer to this of course is most definitely not.

Another point he brings out:

“Make decisions on what YOU want, and not what he MIGHT give you someday. Never be afraid to be alone for the right reasons.”

and:

” I think if you truly find someone, someone that loves you unconditionally, that they would be impatient to start having children with you. And if for some reason they have issues due to childhood trauma or other issues with having children, that they would talk to you honestly and openly about their misgivings. But it sounds like he is throwing money in your direction in order to control you.”
Just a few more intelligent quotes from G Love:

“He sounds like the kind of person who will manipulate and control you. If you love someone, you spend money on them unconditionally, without expecting ANYthing in return. Otherwise, you’re just a prostitute to them.”

“He wants to keep you around to satisfy his own needs and control you. If children come into the picture it means he’s “stuck” with you before he can find someone else. He sounds very self centered if you ask me.

The comments about you having SOO long to have a child and now you are pressuring him is the biggest pile of BS I’ve ever heard. Just because you’ve been very cautious and haven’t just jumped in and get knocked up with anybody, doesn’t mean it’s you’re fault you don’t have kids.”
You can just tell that these people have major life issues and have absolutely no self respect:

shadowsdreamisman, jaded, ?? and eric.
jaded, just because you are a welfare mom with 5 baby daddy’s doesn’t mean I should follow this example as well. So, haaaaaa! In your face Ms. jaded welfare woman!
…and Psusman is right. Someone like him would spitefully treat me and my child badly.

…and Doctor Ashley is right. He is a user.
@eric, I am absolutely gorgeous and I have a good heart so I will always be able to have a partner. If you don’t believe me, just go to Fitness with Dawn on facebook and you will see how I am absolutely perfect and how all the guys are going gaga over me. They always have and they always will So haaaa! In your face sucka!
Regular Texas Guy, that is a very intelligent way to look at relationships. Thank you

Ever since I first started menstrating 13 years ago, I’ve had irregular cycles.

Although, often, I would notice I would go through almost yearly cycles.

Sometimes my cycles would start up, and I would have normal 35 day cycles for close to a year, and then suddenly it would stop.

After suffering from an ectopic pregnancy ( fiance and I weren’t trying then, but it was at the end of one of my “regular” phases) having a baby became something we both really, really wanted.

Of course after the ectopic, my cycle was all fudged up again. I had a period, three months after my surgery- and then didn’t have another normal cycle for one whole year.

Bad timing- my appointment with a fertility specialist actually ended up being the day after my cycle ended- and was sent home with instructions to take provera in 40 days if a regular cycle didn’t resume and then take the clomid.

I ended up having to do so, since I didn’t start my period on my own… and ended up having to do it the following cycle, as I didn’t ovulate with 50 mg of clomid.

After three successful ovulatory cycles on clomid, but with no pregnancy achieved, I decided I needed to take a break… emotionally, physically and mentally.

I decided to still chart- just to see what was going on with my body after the treatment.

Ended up ovulating on my own again this month.

So, curious, has anyone else ovulated on their own after quitting clomid? Any other PCOS ladies out there who also have off and on normal cycles?

Do you think my body will continue to ovulate on its own now?

Your Question
Last year i had two MC back to back and then went thru a year of testing and fertility treatment since i stopped ovulating after my secind MC.. LMP was nov 27th 2009.. had my HSG on dec 4th tested positive for pregnancy on 1/6/10.. called the doctor and went for a HCG beta blood test and confirmed i was preggo..level was 41, 4 days later did another blood draw with was 1/11 and hcg went up to 195 doc said to get another one a week later so i did and on 1/18 hcg level was 2956.. Doc was happy and wanted me to go in for a u/s on 1/26.. when i went in they figured i was 8 weeks and 4 days from LMP even though I have irregular cycles usually every 35 to 40 days but the u/s showed me only being 5 weeks pregnant.. they saw a sac and a large yolk sac in the uterus.. does it look like i will miscarry again? i go back in two weeks for a recheck but it feels like forever away.. i havent had any bleeding mild cramping here and there but nothing bad at all.. but it seems like my hcg is to high to be only 5 weeks cuz at the time of my ultrashould doc said my hcg should be around 30,000 but he didnt feel i needed another blood draw to check

TOLEDO, Ohio – A woman who had the wrong embryo implanted by a fertility clinic has given birth to a boy, her family said Friday.
Sean and Carolyn Savage released a statement Friday night saying a “healthy baby boy,” whom they plan to give up to his biological parents, was delivered Thursday at St. Vincent Mercy Medical Center in Toledo. No information about the baby or the circumstances surrounding the delivery was immediately released.
The Savages, of Sylvania, outside Toldeo, had said earlier this week the baby was to be born in the next two weeks via cesarean section.
In the statement, the Savages offered congratulations to the baby’s biological parents, Paul and Shannon Morell, of suburban Detroit.
“At this time, we would like to offer our heartfelt congratulations to the Morell family on the birth of their son,” the Savages’ statement said. “We wish Paul, Shannon, their twin girls and their new baby boy the best, as they move forward with their lives together.”
The Savages asked for privacy in the days ahead, saying “Our family is going through a very difficult time.”
The Morell family didn’t immediately respond Friday to an e-mail seeking comment.
The Savages extended thanks to people around the world for their support and prayers. They thanked medical professionals for their care and treatment throughout the pregnancy and delivery.
The Savages say a fertility clinic outside Ohio transferred the wrong frozen embryo in February. Ten days later, they got a call from a doctor at the clinic saying she was pregnant with someone else’s child.
The Savages said in an interview with The Associated Press on Wednesday they never considered terminating the pregnancy or trying to fight for custody.
They have hired attorneys who say they are working to make sure the fertility clinic accepts responsibility.
The Morells, who live in Troy, Mich., found out about the fertility clinic mistake a day after the Savages.
The two couples knew nothing about each other. Shannon Morell feared that the pregnant woman would choose abortion, ending their chance to give their 2-year-old twin girls a sibling.
A few days passed before they learned that the Savages were not only willing to continue with the pregnancy but also to hand over the baby without hesitation.
“This was someone else’s child,” 40-year-old Carolyn Savage told the AP on Wednesday. “We didn’t know who it was. We didn’t know if they didn’t have children or if this was their last chance for a child.”

http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20090926/ap_on_re_us/us_wrong_embryo

Black Cohosh, known to some as “a baby in every bottle.” My mother in law took it and very soon after became preggo with her last child. I went to the local herb store and they told me it helps regulate cycles, and does indeed help infertility.

->What are the historical uses of black cohosh?(Read at the *’s at the bottom)

Black cohosh was used in North American Indian medicine for malaise, gynecological disorders, kidney disorders, malaria, rheumatism, and sore throat [3]. It was also used for colds, cough, constipation, hives, and backache and to induce lactation [4]. In 19th-century America, black cohosh was a home remedy used for rheumatism and fever, as a diuretic, and to bring on menstruation. It was extremely popular among a group of alternative practitioners who called black cohosh “macrotys” and prescribed it for rheumatism, lung conditions, neurological conditions, *****and conditions that affected women’s reproductive organs (including menstrual problems, inflammation of the uterus or ovaries, infertility, threatened miscarriage, and relief of labor pains) [4].*****

Hope you enjoy reading on::

http://ods.od.nih.gov/factsheets/blackcohosh.asp

*Mother in law had been TTC with her 3rd child for 6 months..took this and got her BFP withen 2 months*

Sadly, my husband is leaving December 1st for training to deploy to Iraq..I will get to see him off and on until February 2009, I am going to take it so that hopefully we will get our BFP!

www.FertileMindset.tv Visit Fertile Mindset TV for more videos showing you how to use Tapping while you try to conceive, and to help you achieve your perfect mindset for conception. For the ultimate in online fertility support sign up to the Fertile Mindset Program at www.fertilemindset.com

I am using fertility friend for charting and their buddy groups. Lately, a couple of us have had posts censored for ridiculous reasons. We have been trying to follow all their stupid rules, but now that I think about it, it bothers me that we are meeting people and discussing the most intimate details of our lives, but we are absolutely unable to share email addresses or any way to contact each other other than through their site. I enjoy the support of meeting people, but feel I can only make temporary friends there since once I stop paying for my membership I will be unable to contact these people again. Am I being totally unreasonable here?

Is f? underway. . I am cramping and I s? Cr? Tion? N the yellow? Online little blood. Like? s that? I’m out of this month. What else? For the next month. From 3 meses.Segu? ahead and order? some pr? amor-lacing and an end? basal.Tambi m? meters? No I take Fertility Blend for Women and I still? OPK.Estaba using an OPK.? have the whole question of gr? Ficosa really help? Thank you for all your support this month! & &? F? Congratulations to the ladies with luck BFP.Buena? those in the 2WW!